The Toilet Pot. Today I sat on my toilet pot drinking coffee, thinking about nothing, thinking about everything. Thinking about home. Thinking about the past and present. The Toilet Pot where I sat reminded me of a story. The long walk to freedom. The Hunted. The devil is a big liar. It was in 1983 at Igueben College of Education. I was there as a student teacher, training to be an art teacher. It was about 9pm at night in my room with a bush lamp, no electricity as was usual in Nigeria. My stomach was on fire, burning with sensation, eager to go to the toilet which was a pit latrine. Everywhere was pitch dark including the toilet. I had a habit of going to these pit latrines in the dark, use my legs to find the pit hole in the dark, position my ass and anus on the pit-hole for abdominal evacuation, edifice of comfort and discharge my nuclear waste in the stomach down the hole to the pit of hell for the warms to feast on. Thrice that night I walked in the dark to the latrine, getting to the door, thrice my instinct warned me to go and get the bush lamp. Thrice I disobeyed by going back and forth from the room back to the latrine without the lamp. Then the third time, a gentle silent voice ordered me to go and pick up the lamp to see the toilet and pit-hole. It kindly reminded me I had nothing to lose. I obeyed honestly and took the lamp to the toilet. I opened the toilet door and went in with the lamp and locked or secured the door behind me in safety. There was a little wooden box placed on top of the pit-hole to cover it from emitting the terrible odour from a pit latrine. I stood firmly between this wooden box, and pulled down my pants, my John player and testicles sticking and dangling down as I bent down and pulled up the wooden box sideways. "Jesus Christ", I mumbled and flew up the air landing by the door. Coiled inside the box and on the floor between my legs was the blackest, thickest, and longest dangerous snake I have ever encountered in life. It was not just a snake as I watched it uncoil itself gently and purposefully from the wooden box, looked at me intently for a little while as I stood frozen by the door, unable to move and escape. The snake shook it's head around and wangled it's lips at me, telling me, "What a lucky you". What would have happened if my ass and anus is licked and bitten by a rattle snake at night, and my John Player and testicles used by the snake as lollipop in the pit-hole. I thought the snake wanted to attack me. But gently it crawled back before my eyes into the pit-hole, back to the sender in the pit of hell. The feeling of excrement disappeared from my body. Gently I unlocked the toilet door and walked out with the lamp. I awakened everyone and the Landlord to inform them there was a snake in the toilet. What a favour from God. More true life stories continues. long floor-length bridesmaid wears in black